“There’s no place in your life for people that bring you down or hold you back. Cut these people out of your life. Cherish those who lift you up and push you forward.”
—Sahil Bloom, Writer
VIM Executive Coaching, executive business coaches, remains focused on career coaching as an enhancement of our work on mindfulness training. We value working with leaders whose goal is to build careers that are aware, authentic, effective and compassionate.
We readily acknowledge these are tough times for executive leaders who daily, must often negotiate with those who are angry, easily “triggered,” self-serving and inappropriate.
Here in Denver, where VIM Executive Coaching is based, we are often reminded of those whose goal, it seems, is to take as much as they can, as often as they can. In our lovely city (of course, we serve clients nationwide), our past winter was warm and dry. It is no surprise, watering restrictions for lawns were put into place. Though shrubs and gardens can be hand-watered, we have been told to only water lawns two days out of the week. Different areas, are assigned different days.
Nevertheless, we often witness some neighbors and businesses whose sprinkler systems blast away several days a week. There are, of course, “hundreds” of excuses for why it happens when the water board catches them. The truth is, when most are a billed for excessive water use, they privately admit, “I didn’t use that much. Can you blame me for wanting a nice lawn?”
Many of those “caught” readily admit they knew what they were doing (after all, the hours where some abuse the system generally fall between 3:00 a.m. and 5:00 a.m.).
We reflect of what kinds of team members and executives many of these folks make?
The Pandemic of Self-Centeredness
British-based human resources organization People Management, called executive self-centeredness the new pandemic. While it might seem harmless, self-centeredness in the executive corps is a growing danger. The quote we started with, calling on developing an appreciation to cherish those who lift and push others, and to walk away from those holding others back, should be at the heart of career development and coaching.
From the piece, Kevin Johnson, HR executive: stated
“The key to overcoming this challenge lies in building a culture that transcends individual self-interest. In short, leaders must develop a culture where everyone matters, not where a particular individual matters.
For leaders, this often comes down to making one of three choices. First, they can leave the organization. But this solves nothing. Second, they can stay and continue to complain. But complaining makes the situation worse. Third, they stay and make a real difference.”
Individual self-interest in any type of work place, is the equivalent of disregarding the team, mocking the need to propel the organization and to lack the integrity to care for anyone save for self.
Self-interest may result in making a lawn greener than the person next-door, but at what cost?
The Need to Be a Leader
There are, believe it or not, career coaches who advise clients to “take as much as they can get for as long as they can get.” Putting such a mindset within the context of this post, “Water whenever you can get away with it; sneak in the watering during ‘quiet hours,’ show up your neighbors with the greenest lawn and all that.”
The attitude celebrates human self-interest to the point where everything organizationally is irrelevant to the executive except self-interest. It is the opposite of a healthy career attitude and certainly runs counter to everything we teach executive leaders about mindfulness.
Above all else, the attitude does not work in the present-day environment – and historically, never has. Self-centered leadership consistently leads to HR problems and employee departures.
Far better to let the lawn fade a bit, than to take advantage of everyone in the neighborhood! The lawn will come back, the neighbors often won’t.