“I don't want clever conversation
I never want to work that hard,
I just want someone that I can talk to
I want you just the way you are”
—Billy Joel, “Just the Way You Are,” 1977
Trends change, and all too quickly. VIM Executive Coaching went through a kind of cycle just a few years ago, where it seemed almost every potential client wanted to be better at “change management.”
“I want to manage the changes in my company,” was the rallying cry. “I am tired of not reacting fast enough to all the challenges.”
Who Can Blame Them?
“Change management” were the buzzwords on every motivational speaker’s lips from Singapore to Schenectady. Books, podcasts, videos were all extolling the virtues of being able to foresee and outmaneuver challenges in record time. It got to where executive leaders were convinced; they could do it. And, if they failed, they considered themselves failures. Worse, the need to change often extended to themselves.
“If I had only been more outspoken (or quiet), more of a team player (or a person with a single mindset), less judgmental (or more passionate), a better dresser (or less flashy) …”
The marks always seemed to have been missed.
Truth is, “change management” is a myth; such a myth that it has given way to a much more rational model of adaptation. Why this shift in thinking? Because managing change is what psychologists and management experts see as illusory. It is deception; the carrot placed in front of the horse, and far too many fell for it.
Change, by its very definition is not foreseeable. Change does not always allow for logic, such as an expected deliverable. Then again, when an executive leader is admonished for having a set of deliverables not matching up to their “look or vibe or style, etc.,” it leads to ever greater feelings of failure.
Far too often, and especially when going through times of challenge, executives are told to motivate themselves to alter their very lives to compensate for changes far outside their reach.
Much of the judgment is due to babble and traditional stories that are impossible to live up to or match. No one could adequately foresee a pandemic, a housing crisis, political turmoil or conflict. Yet, when those challenges exploded across “a million” boardrooms and work teams, the blame to do better, be better, be more positive, be more…whatever, came down on executives like a ton of something or other.
Being Authentic
Authentic executive leaders learn to adapt, and adaptation is more a function of mindfulness over artificial attempts at management. If given a choice between an executive leader who strains to manage every tiny detail in a perceived atmosphere of change versus a mindful executive who adapts to change, we would take the latter every time.
In an article appearing in Forbes magazine (January 22, 2024), “The Need For Adaptive Leadership: Why Adaptability Wins,” the authors state (our italics):
“Adaptable leaders are proactive, not reactive. They possess a profound awareness of the conditions that threaten to reshape their environment. A great leader intimately understands every facet of their business environment, recognizing what bolsters its stability and what poses a threat…”
Again, far better for leaders to mindfully understand what is going on and adapt, than to try to manage so many factors they cannot control. Don’t go changing to try to please images or styles; adapt to authentically understand the situation. It is as applicable in 2026 as in ancient days. Change is inevitable; adapt to it. Accept the need to respond of course, and reject unfounded blame or “style” as the culprit.
